


Falling, Failing, Breaking. Fixing, Reuniting and Colliding

by nibblechops



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Depression, M/M, Moriarty is Alive, One Shot, Sad Sebastian, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-09 00:21:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1961793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nibblechops/pseuds/nibblechops
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is the story of how Sebastian Moran coped or rather failed to cope in the aftermath of Jim's suicide and the Reichenbach fall.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Falling, Failing, Breaking. Fixing, Reuniting and Colliding

**Author's Note:**

> Hi this is my first work on here so feel free to give feedback hope you like it =).

Alone. That’s what he was now. Just alone. He was barely sat up leaning against one of the kitchen cupboards. He could feel the uncomfortable coldness of the tiles beneath his legs. Two years was all it had taken. Two years and he was no longer Jim’s Tiger. He was just the shell of a once powerful and cunning man. To the side of him was a half empty bottle of vodka. He hated to admit it but this was how he could make it through the day. Slowly he reached for the glass bottle and let the alcohol pour down his throat. He wouldn’t let himself get sober. When he was sober he could feel the pain and the heartbreak.

Jim’s once powerful empire had broken down almost a year ago. Seb knew he only had himself to blame, he had let his boss down. At the thought of Jim Sebastian tossed the empty bottle across the room. He silently let himself feel satisfied as he heard it smash into chunks of sharp weaponry. For the next few hours or days Seb wasn’t really sure he just lay there slipping in and out of consciousness, enjoying the feeling of being able to completely step out of his body and letting himself feel numb. ‘If you could only see me now Jim’ he thought spitefully before slipping back into a daze.

Over the next few days Sebastian died more and more inside. Sherlock Holmes was still alive to him that was as good as saying that his Jim died for nothing. The fact of him being alive tore him up in guilt and streets away you could hear the screams of the shattered man. If you could only see him now Jim.

November 5th Seb made his move. If he lost his Jim then Sherlock would have to learn to cope without his boyfriend. He still had contacts and he organized it all. John Watson was to be burnt alive and there was nothing the virgin could do to stop it from happening. Seb poured himself a glass of whiskey and held it up while saying to himself ‘This is for you Boss’. The news came that morning that Watson had been saved by the afternoon Sebastian was laid blind drunk on the kitchen floor next to three empty bottles of vodka and an empty packet of cigarettes.

He was done now; he’d finished trying to cope without Jim. He had with him a bottle of spirit he didn’t even care what and one of his shotguns. The sentimental part of his logic told him to go the same way as his Jim and in his current state who was he to object? So there he stood, on the rooftop of St. Barts drinking gin and blasting ‘Stayin’ alive’ from his phone. He could see passers by wearing their coats but as far as Seb was concerned there was no biting chill, he couldn’t even make out London’s usual hum of life. Slowly he sat himself down and taking the gun from his back pocket he brought it to his temple.

His shaking finger lay on the trigger. He closed his eyes content finally and pulled it back.

10 seconds later Seb opened his eyes and swore loudly. The safety catch was still on. As he clicked it off he swore he had heard a familiar voice. He stumbled to the side of the rooftop to see on screens everywhere Jim mother fucking Moriarty’s face everywhere accompanied by his warped voice. ‘Did you miss me?’ echoed all around London and for the first time in two years Sebastian Moran smiled. He sat down leaning against the edge smiling a huge shit eating grin and letting tears of happiness race down his cheeks. Alive. That little shit, his little shit was alive. He got up picked up his gun and raced back down to their apartment, the same one he had left barely two hours ago with the intention of never coming back. Once he arrived back there he found fresh flowers on the table and a note.

Less than four hours after Sebastian had almost ended his life he found himself at the pool. The same pool they had first met up with Sherlock Holmes. Out of one of the cubicles appeared the one and only James Moriarty dressed in his favorite Westwood suit. Seb gulped loudly and looked directly at him. ‘How have you been then Boss?’ Seb asked him shyly still looking into Jim’s eyes. Both men took a step towards each other cautiously before Seb thought ‘fuck it’ and walked over to the shorter man and hugged him. “I thought you’d left me” at this Jim looked up at his broken Tiger only now registering the small cuts on his temple and the boney state he was in. This was what it took for Jim to know he’d pushed his sniper too hard this time and held Seb together in his arms.

They both knew that this was ridiculously sentimental for the both of them, but that was how they stayed until Seb had cried out all of his tears and Jim was certain that the man wouldn’t fall apart in front of him. As the two men faced each other Jim suddenly whispered ‘I missed you Seb. So fucking much’ and with that Seb reached down grabbed Jim’s tie and connected their lips. Two years. Two years of waiting, falling, failing and breaking had led Sebastian Moran to this moment. And now here he was reunited with the man he thought was dead on the same day he had almost blown his own brains out. Jim Moriarty the man with the plan had come back from the dead. Just in time to fix his tiger and to prepare to take over the world again but this time no one not even Sherlock bloody Holmes was going to stop them. This alone led the two men out of the swimming pool smiling clutching the hand of the one that they almost lost.


End file.
